Thursday, December 06, 2007

For One More Day...

The very thought-provoking question posed on the Oprah Show yesterday was:

"If you could spend one more day with someone you have loved and lost, what would you say?"

Her guest was Mitch Albom, author of Tuesdays with Morrie and The Five People You Meet in Heaven...and, is now posing that powerful question in his best-selling novel, For One More Day.

I wasn't sure how I would answer that question. I had to think about it for a while. I started to bring to mind the people that I have loved and lost in my life.

Strange that he should come to mind after so many years...but there was "Bucky", an old high school boyfriend and probably my first real love. He was sent to fight in Viet Nam in the 60's........stepped on a mine and was killed instantly. I would have loved to have reconnected with him after high school where I could have possibly separated youthful infatuation from real honesty and caring and getting to know him on a more mature level.

And, how about Gilbere, my hairdresser and dear friend, who died from the devastating affects of AIDS about 15 year's ago? He was such a gentle soul and I would have loved having one more conversation with him about Life.

I can't forget my two Aunts on my mother's side who passed away before getting to live into their Golden Years. I would have loved the opportunity to have gotten to know them as an adult. I loved them all when I was a teenager..but, never had the opportunity to really share my grown up years with either of them or tell them how much I appreciated all that they did for me through the years.

My dad's sister and her husband also left this world before their time. I can still remember my uncle's wonderful N.Y. backyard garden filled with flowers and vegetables. I would have loved to have learned more from him about growing things now that I have gardens of my own.

On my mother's side, I would have liked to have had a day with her father, who left her family during the Depression...leaving my mom and her four other siblings to be raised by their mother in a very difficult time. Oh, I would have so many questions...and I would also want to understand what he was feeling back then...and let him know that he was forgiven.

I would like to have one more day with my mom's mother and just listen to her tell of what it was like back then when she had to deal with being a single mother. There would be so much to learn from this very strong woman. And, I would want to tell her that....if I had one more day to do it.

On my father's side, I would like to have one more day with both of his parents. I knew that my grandfather was a brilliant man who's vision was taken away later in life...but, his gruff exterior never really let any of us get close to the real person underneath. The wisdom he could pass on to me....

Looking at my life, I have been blessed in that so many of the people that I love are still here...still available to talk to and, more importantly, to listen to and learn from.

What I really took away from the show was that while these people are still in my life, I should make sure and let them know NOW how much they mean to me. It is so important to take advantage of our times together....to live in the moment....

I want to try and live my life so that when I do experience the losses I will feel that I made the most of our times together....and I won't have the need to ask for that one more day to find out things I never knew or to tell them how much I love them...

2 comments:

Beverly said...

I've gotten away from watching Oprah very much. I usually check to see what she's having on and then decide. I did watch that show yesterday.

I have two that I would like to spend a last day with...my father who died of a heart attack when I was 22 and living away from home for the first time. And then, of course, my husband, who went to work one day and didn't come home. You can know that there are many things that I wished we had said to each other that morning.

Beverly said...

such a touching post...my first thought was my mother, my grandmother, and my aunt. I would love to talk with someone I never knew, my father.