The Waiting Game...

"In the darkest hour the soul is replenished and given strength to continue and endure." Heart Warrior Chosa

This has been an extremely difficult time for Dave as he waits for the latest update on his sister's condition.

She continues to courageously fight the cancer that has spread throughout her body now. Even though it now seems as if the cancer is winning, she still hangs on.

The family has "given her permission" to "let go" if she needs to as the quality of her life has so diminished. Much of her day is spent in a deep sleep and, at the times when she is awake, she is not always lucid.

It takes an agonizing toll on her loved ones, too. One does not know exactly what to pray for at this point....what prayers would be best for this daughter, mother, grandmother, sister, teacher,and friend to so many? When all is said and done, I imagine that most of the prayers are for her not to suffer anymore...and to be at peace.

While I was in Minnesota with my family, Dave spent Labor Day weekend with his sister and the rest of his family up in Delaware, but had to return late Monday night to go back to work and reality Tuesday morning. He had three wonderful days with her as she was awake more than asleep during that time. But, now, he sits here in Birmingham, many miles away.... awaiting reports from family members as they update her condition to him. It is so hard.

We are both packed and ready to go at a moment's notice...but, in the meantime the roller coaster of Life seems to have the same meaning of the roller coaster of terminal illness. Everything is from minute to minute, hour to hour, day to day. Nothing is for sure.

The helplessness of living so far away is so all-consuming... and the waiting, arduous, as we try to go about our normal activities, all the while jumping at the sound of a phone ringing...eager, yet fearful, of the news...