While working on my pottery today, I watched a movie....

....called "INTO THE WILD"

It is "...a story about Christopher McCandless (Emile Hirsch), a student who after graduating from Emory University, abandons his possessions, gives his entire $24,000 savings account to charity and hitchhikes to Alaska to live in the wilderness. "

For some reason I found myself profoundly affected by this true story of self-discovery. It really touched me deeply and I am sitting here trying to figure out exactly where these feelings are coming from.

As the character, Chris, tries to flee from the trappings of our modern world he finds himself also running away from his own personal pain. He is attempting to heal some wounds that he has from his past...from his parent's abusive relationship and his sometimes painful childhood. Even though he meets many interesting people along the way, most of his journey is spent in isolation. He voraciously reads books that he has gathered along the way...mostly philosophical...and, is also keeping a diary of his own experiences.

He does find out near the end that (his quote) "Happiness is only real when shared." It made me wonder about the idea that no matter how hard we try to run away from feelings, they are always a part of us. He had no contact at all with his family that he left behind...but, I did get the sense that the further away he got, the more loneliness and sadness he felt. He was running away from and to situations that he just couldn't deal with. (spoiler alert here-don't read further if you don't want to know the ending)

As he escaped society and relationships that he left behind, I don't believe that he really found the complete peace of mind that he had hoped for. Sadly, the very food that was sustaining him in the end turned out to be his demise...in that a batch of wild berries that he consumed were actually poisoness and led to his death by starvation. He died alone in the wilds of Alaska. Even if he could have left the area, the stream that would have taken him back to his old life had also swelled, making it impossible to cross. It had become a raging torrent when the snows melted.

Ironically, he touched several lives along the way as he met different people on his journey...but, probably never allowed himself that realization...in that he didn't allow any real relationships to form before he would run away again....always searching.....always leaving.....

I think that we all find ourselves on a journey of sorts...trying to find that elusive happiness. It is not always easy...and, certainly not always immediately attainable. The bumps along the road certainly can make things difficult and uncomfortable.

But, my feelings are, and have always been, that joy is actually right there within each and every one of us...just waiting to be tapped. It is our decision as to what we do with that valuable gift within us....

I hope that you find some of your own happiness every day....and, if you do, share it with those who touch your life...