"...you've got to have friends...."

"I keep my friends as misers do their treasure, because, of all the things granted us by wisdom, none is greater or better than friendship." -Pietro Arentino

My latest edition of "Oprah" Magazine arrived today. The theme this month is "friendship"... and that is a subject near and dear to my heart.

My friends and I call each other, "The Girlies", and have been through so many life passages together....some good, some not so good. But, through it all we have helped each other come up for air and start breathing again. After 25+ years of being friends, we have a feeling of safety in being bluntly honest with each other.

Friends become our therapists as we try to figure out so many of the complexities that life has in store for us. One friend helps me figure out if I am wearing the right shoes (or stockings, no stockings?) for a special event....on occasion I have driven over to her house with dress and shoes in hand awaiting her opinion and, hopefully, her approval.

Another couple of friends listen endlessly to my relationship concerns and always give me another point of view that I may not have considered. They have taught me to see both sides to the story and it has been very helpful.

Some of the girlies I talk to daily....some I catch up with once a week....and some, once a month or longer ... we have to cover a lot of ground when we go this long without speaking.

Several of my closest friends do not live here in town anymore...this is where email and long distance phone calls come in handy.

One very special friend has been dealing with some chronic physical problems for the last several years.....and that struggle has weighed heavily on me as I continue to watch her experiencing chronic pain...but, together we have proven that nothing can keep a friendship from getting through the rough times. We still talk at least once daily. I know that if the tables were turned, she would do the same for me.

Laughing so hard that you actually have tears in your eyes is one of my very favorite things to do with friends. Through the years not all of the tears have been from laughter, and we are there for each other then, too. Divorce, illness, loved ones passing, issues with our children....etc.....I truly believe in the healing power of great friendships. Any time spent with the girlies is memorable....and, we always end these get-togethers by saying, "We need to do this more often!". We love each other like family...but this is a family that we actually get to choose, making it that much more special.

We can sip wine together and talk forever about anything....but, I must admit the conversation seems to quite often become about the opposite sex! Men would never do this....and we embrace and celebrate that difference whenever the girlies get together. Usually, nothing is held back as we share our innermost feelings and thoughts. It is so great to be able to talk about things that you know are being understood.

Friendships are constantly changing. We have gone from raising our children and being in playgroups to receiving our AARP cards and readying for getting older together. More of our time might be spent out of town with our children and grandkids. Now that we are all starting to watch our grown up children marry and have babies...we love sharing all of that, too. I always look forward to viewing the latest 'grandbaby' pictures and hearing the stories. Who knew that it could be this much fun to get older?

My friends know that our close relationships will sustain us through whatever life has in store for us now and in the future. So, thank you, girlies..."

You give me strength during the mad, bizarre days...." Quincy Troupe